Whether you’re happily single or craving a stable relationship, not having a partner has its pros and cons.
Pros : you have the whole bed for yourself and you feel that you can really do what you want, whenever you want.
Cons : besides wanting a relationship and not having it, people can say terrible things! Sometimes so terrible that if you put your eyes just a little more blank they would disappear completely.
These statements are usually said with good intentions and can be reassuring the first few times you listen to them. The problem is that, once you’re single, these statements come to you in bursts to the point that they become unbearable. Here are some of the most common:
1. “Have you tried dating online?”
Do not! Even after the thousands of news that say it is the new way to find love. Even after the endless number of friends who have married after meeting in this way. The thought of it has not even crossed your mind.
2. “You just have to go out and put yourself back in the market!”
This is good advice in the distant possibility that you are locking yourself in the house, refusing to leave. If it is not, it is quite annoying. Like many other single women who want to meet someone, you’ve probably fixed your schedule. You have signed up for the gym and have let your friends find you dates. How much more do you have to expose yourself “in the market”?
3. “I miss being single! You are so lucky “
Of course, they are trying to make you feel that being alone also has its positive side. But it still does not sound good, just as I did not sound good at age 13 screaming songs from Britney, convinced that pop stardom was my destiny.
4. “You will find someone when you least expect it”
This really does not happen. The moment you least expect it, will be when you are sitting in your chair, eating a pizza. I understand that it may seem difficult to find love when you are really determined to do it, but how are you supposed to stop thinking about wanting to have a relationship?
5. “I can not believe you’re still single! If you are a great match “”
Well, you already know that. It’s just that nobody has noticed it.
6. “You have to be fine with yourself first. When you love yourself, someone will love you too “
So how can you explain that there are people whose lives are a mess except for their fairy tale relationship?
7. “There are many fish in the sea”
Love is not just a matter of numbers. If it were, you would literally have so many options. Of course, there are – in theory – hundreds of thousands of guys out there. Would not that mean that you would automatically click with most of them for the simple fact of men?
8. “Why are you still single?”
What a weird question. First of all, if I knew why, I probably would not remain single. Second, this sounds like there’s something wrong with you instead of just not having met the right person yet.
9. “You are too demanding!”
The chances that your standards are unrealistic are not so many. Are you waiting for a doctor of two meters height, who has a lot of money, to take you to dates taken from romantic comedies, and to make you laugh? So, yes, it’s not very realistic. But most single women are realistic about what they want. And speaking from my own experience, being single for a long time can lower your standards to a very dangerous territory. If you know you are being reasonable, stick to your standards.